Have you felt this before? The 'call' to some huge change that will give you a fresh start in an area of your life?
It
can be scary, I know, and VERY exciting at the same time. In fact, those two feelings sometimes are SO similar that we're not quite sure whether we feel excitement or fear.
Well, finally, finally, after months of hard work, preparation, throwing out, culling, selling, giving away, letting go - we're in our new home in London, slowly settling in to the 'new normal'.
It's not an easy thing to experience big change. Human beings are mostly designed to run on autopilot, and work inside their comfort zone. The brain prefers 'known' things and situations for many reasons.
One of them is safety - it KNOWS how to keep us safe if it can check back in its databanks to previous experiences that are similar to what we're
experiencing now. When there's no similar situation to check in the past (I've never moved to England before, we had no idea where to start looking for a new home, there was SO much up in the air and uncertain for many months....) the brain simply has no data to refer back to. It feels really uncomfortable with all the unknowns - so then everything starts to feel like a threat. ESPECIALLY, , for introverts.
Some extroverts thrive on adventure, uncertainty and adrenaline. Much, much less so for introverts. We thrive in an environment where the parasympathetic nervous system is activated - the 'rest and recharge' part of our nervous system.
When SO much is unknown, the sympathetic nervous system tends to get activated, which brings with it a lot of anxiety, fear, worry, cortisol - and
therefore, often, health issues.
Another reason that the brain wants 'known' situations is that it's an amazing energy-conserving device. It prefers to keep it's limited resources for things that are REALLY necessary, should it become necessary - so it wants to do as much as possible on autopilot.
And when we
undergo change, like moving house, or breaking up a relationship, or starting a new job, very few things are on autopilot yet... there are no habits there yet to take over, everything FEELS different - so we have to spend a LOT of brain power consciously thinking about how to do things. It eats up a lot of our available energy.
Of course, there are BENEFITS to change, too. Some I've found so
far:
1. I can re-invent myself in a new country. I can almost decide who and how I want to be in a new place, without fearing the question "And who do you think you are, to change so suddenly, just like that?"
2. I can create new habits with much more ease than in the
old environment. Precisely because of that energy-saving-need of our brain, when we're in the usual, old environment, it's HARD to change habits. Here, in my new flat, I suddenly had to THINK what I need to do next. Everything looked and felt and sounded different.... and I had the opportunity to carefully DESIGN my days, choose new habits and do things in different ways.
3. We build courage,
strength and other resilience qualities. Every time I get into a PACKED underground tube, I have to STRETCCCCHHHHH my comfort zone and remind myself it's only for a few minutes. I have to gather ALL the courage in my body and mind to squeeze in next to the other sardines.... and yes, indeed, every time it IS a little easier and I feel stronger and braver for it.
4. There's a bigger EFT
community in London than where I was in Joburg, South Africa. I've already been to 2 mentoring days with people I've always admired from afar.... and boy, how grateful I am that I was already in touch with them through social media and technology. The in-person-hello was comfortable because of that.
5. I get to experience a totally different kind of weather pattern. I was used to
summer and sun most of the year.... and winter usually almost jumped right into summer instead of a gradual change to spring. Here, the seasons seem much more distinct and I've loved the big difference so far. Yesterday we had snow - another first for me.
6. I get to walk a whole lot more here! In South Africa, on client-days, I often battled to get above 1,000 steps on my step-device. Here,
I make a point of going out every single day to walk in the area around us. I very easily rack up between 6,000 and 10,000 steps a day. Plus of course - we don't have a car yet, and if i want to shop, I walk there and back with a few bags of groceries. Extra exercise for the arms!!
Now, I'd love to hear from YOU:
1. What big change have you had to navigate this year, or will you need
to in the near future?
2. What's your biggest fear, worry or discomfort about that?
3. How did you overcome that - or do you still need to find a way past it?
4. What benefits have you found so far in the change, if any?
Another
weird difference is that in SA, this time of year, virtually everything comes to a standstill.... it's the summer holiday, baby!! Here in the UK, it doesn't feel the same at all. I have the sense that 'life continues' through the cold winter months - and then, we might take a glorious break in summer somewhere between June and September.
So, in my newsletter, too, I get to do it differently this year. This
might not be the last email from me until mid-January (or, it might - I'm still reinventing my thoughts too...).
Whatever happens on the newsletter front - I DO want to say a big huge THANK YOU to you, , for staying with me through so much change and upheaval, and silence from my side. I appreciate your presence in my community so very much.
If you're going on holiday and switching off for a few weeks - have fabulous fun and a great recharge!! And if you're hanging in there, may this time of year bring you many blessings in other forms.
